Long Time Gone II - Mid-October to Thanksgiving

Then it got bad. I found out that one of my students is has a mass in his brain; so deep and so large it is impossibly inoperable. He’s handling it well, and has recently started aggressive chemo. But it is very scary.

When I found out that news, I hadn’t run in weeks since the Hudy 14k. But after hearing it I needed a release, and my stress eating was starting to show (several nights my dinner consisted of a pint of Greaters and 2 cans of Diet Dew). So I laced up my shoes and went for a run. And I have got to say, I’ve never outright cried on a run before. I’ve had my eyes tear up from wind or cold, but never had I bawled whilst running.

I don’t know what to do, I wonder if I’m more frightened then the student or his classmates. I’ve been beating myself up over this too much, and the worst part is that fact that there’s nothing I can do. The sense of helplessness that cancer brings, is something ‘younger me’ didn’t comprehend when my grandmother went through it all those years ago. We’ve met with him, he’s visited school, and I’ve even had the class Skype with him during class after his first day of chemo. Even without the knowledge from being briefed by his mom and the hospital staff; I know this kid, this 13 year old kid has a very long, very hard road ahead of himself.

That being said, I haven’t been on my blog lately, and have spent just as little time on Dailymile. I hope to get back into things, just as I’ve gotten back into the running. It’s odd, the things that serve as catalysts in our lives.

Tomorrow I run in a 5k fundraiser for my own school. I'd like to run a fast time, but I'm happy just getting back into it. Hopefully, I post a race result sometime sooner than 4 months.

Long Time Gone - July to mid-October

I’ve figured out why I post so rarely. I spend too much time fussing over the poetic imagery, writing style, and quality of the work. I write as though I’m trying to write an essay for Lit class, but with out the deadlines of a taken course, so there’s no pressure to ever actually produce. I look in my folder and have 5 “starts” of posts, but none finished. So until I can find a way to manage my time, the posts will be more of outlines. I’d rather have regular short posts than irregular long ones. Perhaps there will be some humor and some broad vocabulary thrown in, but I won’t be going out of my way to make it happen, at least not for now.

So let me catch you up to (my mediocre) speed.

On the Fourth of July I set out to beat the PR of 26:00 I set at the same race a year before. The day was muggy and overcast. I started out a little too strong, lagged a little in the middle, but played catch-up games all along the course. Ultimately I did set a new PR by over 20 seconds. And I placed second in my weight division, got a medal and wore it almost all day (except for when my son insisted on wearing it). Yea me!

Flash forward a few weeks.

My training was going great. My long runs had reached double digits, I was getting in decent speedwork, and I had a decent plan for working my runs into the schedule of my upcoming school year.

End of August I registered for a Thursday night 5k, The Fox and The Hound 5k. It was a risk, being after a long day of school and the night before another long day of school, I knew would be tough. Nonetheless I had a great time, made it a point to run negative splits, and ran a great race. I really wish I had more time to stick around for the after-party, it was a dusk party on the “Purple People” bridge. Can’t wait til next year when I can run it with someone I know.

Then I ran a 5k for our local zoo. Holy Hills! It was rough, but I really enjoyed it, and got to meet one of my Dailymile friends.

Then...then...things got busy.

On September 14th my daughter, Cassandra, was born. It was glorious, it was wonderful, it was utterly exhausting.

On September 17th I woke up to run the Hudelpohl 14k, it was a hilly run through Cincinnati during Oktoberfest, so I ran in lederhosen. Yes, lederhosen, all 14k, it was a blast. I took it a little easy on the course because I was in costume, I haven't had a good week of running since Aug, and I wanted to make sure I wasn't going to be physically useless the rest of the weekend (I do have a toddler, a newborn, and a post-partum wife at home). When I crossed the line, I really felt like I had more than enough gas in the tank. Despite that, the 1:21:36 was enough to put me at 8th place in my weightclass. The after party was a little packed and disorganized, though I'm sure it'll be fixed for next year. This will definitely be a regular on my race schedule. I was also glad that, my Dailymile friend, Peggy was able to find me after the race to chat, since she blew by me around mile 5.

Then it took a turn for the worse. On top of the whole newborn thing, I then pulled a groin muscle. Between those two, running time was drastically cut. Then school was really starting to get to me.

Then, my wife’s incision turned out to be infected. After only two days back to school my wife had to be admitted to the ER and ended up there for about 5 days. I ended up having to drive back and forth to the hospital when I wasn’t taking care of my two kids to pick up bags of breastmilk so I can feed my daughter (because she couldn’t stay at the hospital with my wife). After it was all said and done, my wife is fine now and back home.